My Heaven

       I bet we all have our thoughts about life after death...if your like me, you have them EVERYDAY, now don't get me, wrong I'm NOT suicidal or anything. I love life and I've very appreciate of my blessings and my shortcomings. I just like to reassure myself that tomorrow is never promised, and when my day comes I won't be scared. I picture "My Heaven" to be the most serene and majestic place I've ever seen, and ill know where I'm at because I've been there. I'd have the most amazing memories there, with my family and loved ones. Of course my dogs I've lost before will be there, my family, the family I've yet to have and friends I've yet to meet. I will occasionally come back and let my presence be known, but you'll know its me, when a random memory of us comes along, or you hear a song you might have heard me sing. I'd like to come back as Rainbows just because of my optimistic outlook on life and how I always see the rainbow at the end of every storm. I don't know what inspired me to write this maybe the movie? But if ever I touched YOUR life, and I can leave a "physical thank you" for letting me be part of a memory, part of laughter or a smile on your face.

And if ever I caused hurt,pain or any insecurity I apologize I know not to hold grudges so I carry no burden.<3

:( Missing Home...

      So a couple days ago it was my mommas birthday(Sept 19th 2011) and I wish I was there to celebrate her birthday with her...There is so much about home I miss, especially when things here get so hard.

I understand that this is a learning experience and being on our own is only going to make us stronger. I  sometimes just don't understand why we are being tested so "often". :( I mean it's like as soon as we're comfortable BAM something strikes.

     I know life would be boring if we were always comfortable, but we cant wait till life starts throwing the "Fun" or "Good" curve balls at us, for now it seems to just keep being more like a "Hit and Miss".  I just hope things get better so we can go back home to be with our family. We feel like we're missing out on so much back home that we just wish we can just drop everything and go home.

Personally I'm a little upset at the fact that NONE of MY family have come to visit me :( I feel like i am being judged for my decision for coming out here, I can feel the comments, the whispers and negativity and I'm hurt, i feel alone...

My mother calls me EVERYDAY, she's the only piece of home I really have, I love her so much for doing that for me, it means the world to me....

When I talk to the rest of my family and express how much I miss them, I get the "well, you made that decision you live with it" response and it kills me. I wanna know that I'm missed as well.

Maybe I'm just being a baby, Gio tells me I need to "man up" (lol) he wants me to be strong. He's my rock and he keeps me from falling apart. My Mom also tells me "Its when they STOP talking about you, that you should worry" but unfortunately lately I do care what people think and say about me :(. I'm not a bad person, I just want that recognized....Maybe I'm asking for too much, but for now I'm just venting.

                                          

My life is blossoming in the most amazing way!

Wow its been a while since I've blogged, but today is the 9th of August of 2011.
At this point I love life and EVERYTHING it brings. From its trails and tribulation to its greatest blessings and joyful moments.

Life as independent "young adults" has been VERY challenging, we struggle here and there but we are overcoming many obstacles. we recently started going back to school. we are going to be Phlebotomist I'm so excited!.I miss the experience itself of going to school, the homework, the note taking the test!.Everything is falling into place for us.I am a very spiritual and i pray constantly when i know things are getting too hard for us. My life has its ups and downs but i wouldn't ask for anything other then the one I've been blessed with<3.

"For You Mommy"

"Super Mom"

Mom, you're a wonderful mother,
So gentle, yet so strong.
The many ways you show you care
Always make me feel I belong.

You're patient when I'm foolish;
You give guidance when I ask;
It seems you can do most anything;
You're the master of every task.

You're a dependable source of comfort;
You're my cushion when I fall.
You help in times of trouble;
You support me whenever I call.

I love you more than you know;
You have my total respect.
If I had my choice of mothers,
You'd be the one I'd select!

By Joanna Fuchs